Why am I writing about romantic things to do for your wife, husband, or partner? (Or girlfriend or boyfriend?)

Well, my wedding anniversary was last Sunday, and that always makes me think about ways to be more romantic. (I’ve shared marriage advice before, but my best advice is to get in the habit of kindness and realize that very few things are worth fighting about.)

If you’re always looking for ways to be a more romantic wife or husband, too, this is perfect for you. I honestly I think this is a good master list for writers, too. As a romance author and a romance editor in publishing, I know a list of romantic gestures like this can be really useful in writing a romance novel or a sweet romantic subplot. One of these things, properly placed in your novel, might make readers go, “Awww!”

I think it’s so important in a romantic relationship not to take your significant other for granted. I’ve been married for a very long time, but I’m committed to keeping the spark in our relationship and keeping the romance alive. When I do list posts on this blog, they are always for me, too!

Since I have a lot of younger readers, I’m going to keep this pretty wholesome, though I’ll admit that plenty of other ideas came to mind! I’ll just talk about sweet romantic gestures, romantic gifts for your wife or husband, ways to be romantic together, and so on.

I tried to include a lot of cheap and free ideas. There’s nothing more annoying than an article that makes you think, “Sure, all of these ideas would be great if I had an extra twenty thousand dollars lying around.” There are a few expensive things on here, but there are a lot more romantic ideas that are great for couples on a budget! (Please note, though, that a handful of these are not practical during a pandemic, though they may be later. Stay safe!)

By the way, if you’re looking for romantic and just plain sweet ways to compliment your significant other, be sure to check out my List of 101 Compliments.

This is a big post full of ideas, so be sure to pin or bookmark it for future inspiration!

 

 

1. Go a solid week without saying anything negative or critical.

2. Even better…go a solid week not only refraining from critical talk, but also flooding them with praise and appreciation! (Besides the immediate benefit, this is a great way for you to disrupt bad patterns of communication.)

3. If you’ve somehow gotten out of the habit of having proper meals at the table together…get in the habit. (We’re not the only ones, are we?!)

4. Make a romantic playlist for them…or for those dinners together! If you want to get old-school, burn a CD of romantic songs and give it to them as a gift.

5. If you don’t have a song that’s “your song,” choose one together. (Or choose a new one, if you’re tired of the old one!)

6. I’m kind of a geek about fragrance, so that’s where this one is coming from: buy them several different cologne or perfume samples (try The Perfumed Court or Perfume.com), and once they’ve tried them all, buy a full-size bottle of their favorite.

7. Try out aromatherapy: rose, vanilla, ylang-ylang, jasmine, and clary sage are all supposed to be romantic. Patchouli, too, but just use a little in combination with other scents, or else it’s a bit funky. 🙂 We have this type of diffuser for essential oils and we love it. (Be sure to keep essential oils away from kids and pets, though.)

8. Pay close attention to things your partner likes and offhand comments they make, and keep a secret list of gifts they’d love to get.

9. Give them a little gift on a certain day of the month…like the 9th, for instance. See if they ever figure out that it always happens on that date. (After a year, you can tell them.)

10. Watch the sport you’re not a fan of, their boring period drama, or their trashy reality TV show with them…or at least leave them in peace to watch it. (This one is a reminder to me, personally. It’s hard for me not to criticize certain reality TV programs!)

11. On a related note: declare a weekly “dinner and a movie” night. Take turns choosing the movies. No complaints about the other person’s pick.

12. A variation on the above: watch an Italian movie (or one that takes place in Italy, like Call Me By Your Name, To Catch a Thief, or Room With a View) and make Italian food. Or watch My Big Fat Greek Wedding and make Greek food, or watch a an old classic and make recipes from a vintage cookbook…you get the idea.

13. Drive to a romantic lookout spot and make out.

14. Do that one chore they’re always asking you to do…even though they didn’t ask this time.

15. Take them on a mystery date…a new restaurant for dinner, followed by a surprise event that they’ll love…but that they would never expect you to buy tickets to.

16. Buy something they love to eat or drink, even if it’s not your thing, whether it’s gourmet cheese, dark chocolate, craft beer, or gummi bears.

17. If they’re crazy about coffee, tea, wine, whiskey, hot sauce, or whatever…get them five different kinds so they can have a taste test.

18. Send flirty texts…even if they’re in the next room.

19. If you’re calling them and they don’t pick up, don’t get annoyed…instead, take the opportunity to leave them a romantic voice mail.

20. Go on a hike together.

21. Pack a picnic and go out into the country for some stargazing.

22. Exercise date! Take a class together, do a workout video at home, or take turns on the exercise bike…then shower and have a romantic but healthy meal.

23. Surprise breakfast in bed…a classic move.

24. Go to an art museum together…or tour one online.

25. Go to the opera…or watch one online.

26. Start calling them a new endearing nickname. (You may want to run several choices by them first to see what they like best.)

27. Order them a gift and when the package arrives, act like you have no idea what it is.

28. Use YouTube tutorials to learn how to give each other foot massages, hand massages, or back massages…

29. Or use YouTube tutorials to learn ballroom dancing. (Either you two will be okay at it, or you’ll have a lot of laughs…either way, you win.)

30. When you’re socializing with your partner, brag about them to other people.

31. When you see your partner at a distance, blow them a kiss.

32. Instead of hollering to them from another room, go to where they are when you want to talk to them! (I’m working on this one, too.)

33. Become a good listener. When they’re talking, don’t stare at a phone screen or a TV screen—look at them. Don’t interrupt. And make sure they understand that you heard them.

34. Designate a certain place as “your place”—a certain booth in a restaurant, a bench in a park, or a table at the library.

35. Find out what one of their favorite toys was when they were a kid. Months later, when they’ve forgotten about the conversation, find the toy on eBay and get it for them for a gift.

36. Spend a Saturday morning watching cartoons or a Disney movie. Maybe treat yourself to sugary cereal.

37. Figure out a way to get plenty of sleep so you’re romantic instead of tired and grouchy.

38. Upgrade your bedroom with new sheets, a romantic print, candles, chocolate in the nightstand drawer, or whatever feels right to you.

39. Buy a book about love or relationships, read it together, and discuss it: for example, The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman.

40. Take turns answering Dr. Aron’s 36 Questions That Lead to Love.

41. Play a game: act like you’re on your very first date.

42. Play a game: pretend you’re both in a reality show about romantic couples, with camera crews capturing your love story.

43. Make the first thing you say to them in the morning and the last thing you say to them at night something loving and appreciative.

44. Write them a love letter! Fill it with compliments, things you appreciate about them, happy memories about the past, and/or hopes for your future together.

45. Put romantic greeting cards where they’ll be sure to find them…on the bathroom mirror, the computer monitor, or the steering wheel, for instance.

46. Go on a hot-air balloon ride together.

47. Hold hands more often.

48. Cuddle more often.

49. Ask them if you can bring them a cup of coffee, a glass of iced tea, or whatever they like to drink.

50. When they’re grouchy, roll your eyes and ignore it instead of taking it too personally.

51. When you’re grouchy, try hard not to take it out on them.

52. Become more aware of your tone in general…make an affectionate tone of voice the default. (Here’s a great article about how contempt kills relationships…strive to communicate the exact opposite!)

53. Learn how to say “I love you” and other romantic things in other languages.

54. Research cheesy pickup lines and use them on your partner.

55. Learn some corny jokes and tell them to your partner.

56. Learn a romantic toast and surprise them!

57. Go out for ice cream in your pajamas on a summer night.

58. Actually do a puzzle together or play a board game together, if you’ve got them around!

59. Read books or poetry out loud to one another.

60. Make sure they know that you believe in their dreams, goals, and ambitions. Tell them that they can do it!

61. Go to a farmer’s market together…

62. Or go to a pick-your-own berry farm or apple orchard.

63. Kiss in the rain.

64. Set an alarm on your phone for a random time during the day. When it goes off, stop what you’re doing and take a few minutes to think about what you love and appreciate about your partner.

65. Go mini golfing together…

66. Or go to a retro arcade for pinball and Pac-Man.

67. For married couples: decorate your car with a “just married” sign and cans tied to the bumper. Drive around town.

68. When they’re taking a shower, warm up a towel or a bathrobe in the dryer for them.

69. Sing them a love song…or a song to wake them up…or a silly song to cheer them up when they’re down.

70. Secretly set up their phone so it plays a song you both love when you call (nothing that would embarrass them in public, though.)

71. Or change their boring default phone screen to something they’ll appreciate.

72. If they like flowers, bring home flowers for no reason (or have a bouquet sent to their office.)

73. For people with low ceilings: get a bunch of helium balloons with long ribbons and fill up the ceiling of a room with them. Attach a love note to each ribbon.

74. If you’re the driven person in the relationship…relax a little and have more fun. They’ll find it charming.

75. If you’re the relaxed person in the relationship…get a little more disciplined. They’ll find it sexy.

76. Take a day trip to explore a small town or visit a quirky tourist attraction.

77. Bake them an angel food cake and tell them it’s because they’re an angel. (If they’re a vegan, you can make it vegan.)

78. Make them a truly amazing hero sandwich and tell them it’s because they’re your hero.

79. Show understanding about things that your partner really can’t help! If they’re uncoordinated, they’re hard of hearing, or they have a poor sense of direction, never give them a hard time about it! Instead, think about how to make life easier for them!

80. Long-term couples: make a date to look back at old happy photos from over the years.

81. Also for long-term couples: “Do you remember when…” Bring up some of the happiest and most romantic times you’ve had together.

82. If you’re parents, don’t feel guilty about scheduling regular time away from the kids if it’s at all feasible. It’s good for them to be independent, and if your marriage is strong and you’re happy, they will benefit from that every day. Besides, maybe they need breaks from you, too.

83. Acknowledge your partner’s small daily victories.

84. Remind your partner of the kind things and the impressive things they’ve done in the past.

85. Share one romantic date a week for a solid year. (If you’re creative about it, you can do this without even leaving home, if necessary.)

86. Start a scrapbook of your romantic dates. From each date, keep something—a ticket, a pressed leaf, a photo—and write a line or two about it.

87. Read their daily horoscope to them…but only when it’s very positive!

88. Cheap date: go to the library. Then go to a coffee shop and discuss the books you checked out.

89. Fly a kite together.

90. Give them a Christmas stocking full of little gifts. (Heck, do it in June, if you feel like it.)

91. For Halloween, go all-out on a couples’ costume. (I still wait to do fisherman and mermaid with Mr. Donovan. I would be the mermaid.)

92. Celebrate Wife Appreciation Day on the third Sunday in September. (The fun part about this, of course, is that she’s going to have no idea it’s Wife Appreciation Day.)

93. Celebrate Husband Appreciation Day on the third Sunday in April.

94. Celebrate National Waffle Day on August 24 by having a waffle breakfast together.

95. Celebrate all kinds of random holidays…you can find them for every day of the year here!

96. Throw your partner a surprise party for one of these occasions…decorate with balloons and streamers, buy a gift, and have a cake.

97. Secretly order a Romance Magnetic Poetry Kit and surprise them with a love note on the fridge.

98. If there’s something you’ve been trying to change about them for a long time, but it’s not a deal-breaker…give up and accept it.

99. Brainstorm ways to be a better partner. Get feedback from your beloved on a few ideas to learn which would be the most meaningful to them…and then do it!

100. Resolve to be romantic every day…for the rest of your lives together.[spacer height=”20px”]

 

As you probably noticed, some of these are just silly or sweet…and some of them actually mean growing as a person. I really believe that regardless of circumstances or age, any couple can become more romantic than they ever have before…as long as they’re willing!

Do you have other suggestions for romantic things to do for your wife, husband, or signification other? If you’re a writer reading this, you might want to tell us about a romantic gift or gesture you wrote about, too! I’m guessing that the comments section on this post will add to the list of romantic gestures and things to do.

Thanks so much for reading, and remember to love yourself, too! Have a great day!