the gift of being a late bloomer #success late in life #success after 40 50 60

Updated for 2023.

When I lived in Kansas, my husband and I had a flower garden. We planted all kinds of flowers, annuals and perennials. The spring and early summer flowers—tulips, peonies, irises—were lovely, but they didn’t bloom for long.

I loved the garden in August, when the zinnias, black-eyed Susans, and Russian sage were in full force. A thunderstorm didn’t leave them dropping petals or drooping their heads like sulky adolescents. They didn’t care. They were sturdy. They bloomed longer.

I think about those flowers a lot.

 

the gift of being a late bloomer #success late in life #success after 40 50 60

 

When I graduated from an MFA program in creative writing, I felt pretty confident in my talents as a writer. After all, I’d gotten a coveted fellowship to attend the MFA program. I’d published poems in respectable literary magazines, like Ploughshares and North American Review. I had the amazing fortune of getting a fun full-time writing job soon after graduation, and I didn’t have trouble working on my own writing on the side.

But then, nothing really happened with my writing.

I entered poetry book contests and didn’t win. I could still get individual poems published in literary magazines, and that was always satisfying, but it would never really change my life.

I tried to write a novel, and I expected to know how to do it, since I’d read thousands of them. It didn’t work that way at all. It took me years to figure out how to even finish one. It took me even longer to learn some basic things about genre, structure, point of view, clean prose, and so on, so that a novel was actually decent.

It would’ve been reasonable to give up on writing, and a couple of times—once when I took my first job in management, and once when I was working in retail advertising—I tried. I’d wind up going back to it after a year or two, because I loved it.

This would be the time where I would talk about my big break, or my big breakthrough. I didn’t have one! I had a bunch of small breaks, though.

I got my first contract for a novel—with a small, digital-first publisher, but I was thrilled. Then I got another one.

I started understanding who I was for the first time. I wasn’t hip and snarky, though I’d tried to be in the past. I was happiest when I was positive and fearless. This led to a few awesome things: my kidney donation to a stranger, and my own line of cards and gifts that expressed that optimism.

I started this blog and discovered I had both a talent and passion for pulling together resources and help for writers…exactly because writing hadn’t come easily to me. I published a reference book for writers that people liked a lot…and then published another one.

I wrote paranormal romance novels. I started up a publishing house for an entertainment company (and wrote one book and two detailed treatments for movies for them.) After I left that job, I got an agent…and then a 2-book deal with a major publisher.

Maybe none of these things are huge successes, but they meant a lot to me. They all happened after many people would think, “Well, nothing interesting is ever going to happen. I’ve missed my window.” And I believe even better things are ahead.

There are some wonderful benefits to being a late bloomer.

You’re stronger. You can push through frustrations and setbacks, and a disappointment doesn’t lay you low.

You have more experience. You’ve interacted with many more people. You know what it’s like to be young and also what it’s like to be not young. This helps you to get along with others. If you’re a writer, it also helps in creating all kinds of characters, including those who are nothing like you.

You’re not anxious about whether you can live up to the big successes in your past, because hey! You don’t have any! It’s actually freeing. If a person hits it big when they’re young and then can’t attain that same success later, it can really mess them up in the head.

If you haven’t achieved what you want to achieve yet—finishing a novel, getting married, or what have you—you haven’t missed your opportunity. Well, maybe you have for a few select careers, such as being an Olympic gymnast, but for most things, you haven’t. You might just be a late bloomer. And that’s beautiful.

Are your biggest successes still ahead of you? Is age something you think about much when you think about dreams and goals? Share your perspective in the comments! Thanks for reading, and I hope you’re having a good week!

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