I’ve been doing a lot of thinking lately about how to restart a bad day. Because if you’re like me, sometimes you get a day that’s not going your way, and by lunchtime you’re thinking, “Ugh. Today is awful. Maybe tomorrow will be better.”
I know this is faulty thinking. Yes, a good night’s sleep can lead to a better frame of mind, and the dawn is a universal symbol for a fresh start.
But sometimes, I’m giving up on the present day too easily. A bad morning doesn’t mean the afternoon is a lost cause, and a bad day doesn’t mean I have to have a bad night.
I’ve done some thinking about how to make a bad day better…things that have helped me start the day over, even if morning is long past. Maybe some of these will help reboot your day, too.
1. Reach out to others.
Most of us wish we kept in better touch with some of the important people in our lives. Getting into the habit of reaching out to others when we’re having a bad day accomplishes two things: it makes our bad days a little (or a lot!) better, and it improves our relationships.
Text the aunt, sibling, nephew, or friend from college you haven’t talked to in a while. Write a note to your grandma or grandchild — a written card or quick letter can mean so much. If you work in an office, go say hello to a coworker and ask how their day is going.
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2. Say a prayer.
If you are a religious person, then besides reaching out, you can also reach up or reach within. Whether you are Christian, Jewish, Muslim, Pagan, or another spiritual path, remember that prayer is a powerful neutralizer of bad days. If it makes sense with your tradition, you might want to take a few minutes to say thank you for the good in your life and to ask for strength in dealing whatever you have to deal with.
3. Take a walk.
If you’ve been at home all day, take a walk if that’s possible. If you’re at work, step outside for five minutes if you can. This can help your brain step off its hamster wheel of negative thoughts. I especially think it’s healing to have the earth under your feet.
This is going to sound silly, but did you watch the 90s sitcom Friends? In the one where Ross and Rachel have a fight that leads to their breakup, Rachel says something along the lines of, “Maybe we should take a break.” Ross, misunderstanding, agrees and says it’s a good idea–they should take a walk and get a frozen yogurt or something. Rachel explains that no, she means they should take a break in their relationship.
Now, Rachel regrets this almost immediately. I know that these days, everyone thinks Ross is awful, but the truth is, if they’d done what Ross had suggested — take a walk, get a frozen yogurt — they probably could’ve saved themselves a lot of grief. Sometimes a simple change in scenery can clear your head.
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4. Visualize a better place.
If you can’t take a walk–or at least, you can’t take a pleasant one–this is another way to change your environment. It might even be a more profound and positive way to do it. You can do it just about anywhere, and it only takes a few minutes.
“Go to your happy place” is a cliched punchline–in the United States, anyway. But so what? This really works.
Close your eyes and imagine yourself in an idyllic place. It might be somewhere you’ve been before, such as a lake, a beach, or even a ballpark. It might be a place you can only get to in your imagination: Lothlorien from Lord of the Rings, or floating among the stars. It could be a different place every time.
Spend a little time there. You’ll feel refreshed when you come back to reality.
5. Change the mood with music.
Just sitting and listening to one or two songs you love, straight through, can be a great way to recharge and start over.
The kind of music is up to you. It might be soothing new age music accented with nature sounds, a hiphop song that makes you feel like you can conquer the world, a piece of pop fluff that makes you smile, or a great classical work that makes you feel like everything’s under control.
You might want to make a specific playlist for rebooting a bad day. After all, u don’t want to be scrambling through your music library every time.
Knowing that we can make a fresh start at any hour of any day gives us a lot more power. It enables us to have a happier week…and a happier life.
How do you hit the “refresh” button? How do you turn a bad day around? If you use creative visualization, what’s your “happy place”? Let us know in the comments! Thanks for reading, and I hope you have a wonderful week!
My happy place has been the beach, in Michigan, for several years. When I am having a painful medical treatment, I go to the beach and I don’t need pain meds on top of what I am having done….
But it is much harder to do since my best friend that I always went to the beach with died suddenly. She had been scratched by a kitten many years before and literally contracted cat scratch fever. She was tested and treated for many many things but never that until she was near death. By then it was too late.
I try to go to the beach in my mind now, but it isn’t the same.
Maybe someday it will work again!@
Pat, I am so sorry to hear about your friend. I honestly didn’t know cat scratch fever was so dangerous. What a tragedy. I hope that with time the memories are more comforting than painful. <3
This is such a great post because I don’t think there’s a single person who hasn’t experienced the frustration of a bad day. I find there’s a two-fold problem with the bad day for me (don’t know if this happens to others). On a logical level, I tell myself “I’m having a bad day…it’s all in my head…look at everything from this point forward with a fresh, open mind and be ready to receive happiness.” Yeah…and then there’s the Dark Side that doesn’t actually “feel” what I’m telling myself. That voice is pure emotional negativity, and it feels like a piece of coal that’s lodged somewhere between my heart and my stomach. I do actually have a “Bad Day” playlist on my PC. The songs are ones like “Bad Day” by Daniel Powter, “Lightning Crashes” by Live, “Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm” by Crash Test Dummies, “100 Tears Away” by Vonda Shepard (some days I empathize with Ally McBeal!)…etc. I find I need to take a moment…really get into the pain of what I’m feeling…wallow in it…and suddenly it starts to get better. It’s like I need to give myself permission — or validate — my bad feelings before I can walk away from them. Then I can switch to my “Rockin'” playlist and things get better. 🙂
Lisa, I know what you mean about the part of yourself that doesn’t want to feel positivity! I like your advice about acknowledging it before trying to make it go away. I may need to make a “Bad Day” playlist and try it out! At the very least, I’d think, “Hey, I’m prepared for this.” 🙂
It’s the music for me…every time.
Hi, Bonnie! Yeah, I don’t know where I’d be sometimes without my favorite music. It’s amazing what a difference it can make. Hope everything’s going great with you!
I love the positive energy in this post. So many great ideas! For me, it can be really hard to pull out of a slump, but movement seems to help more than anything. A brisk walk outdoors, a bike ride… Even if it’s just for five minutes. Fresh air and sunshine are a definite plus. But putting on rain boots and splashing through rain puddles will do in a pinch, too. Bad days can be tough to turn around, thanks for these awesome suggestions!
Hey, thanks for reading — and for commenting! These are great ideas. I think you’re right. There’s something about movement that gets us out of our rut!
Great advise Bryn, as always. One of the things I recently found helps when trying to restart a bad day is making a list of the tiny victories you’ve had so far. What have you done right or well so far? It can be simple things like making the bed or getting to work on time, or you can do big stuff like paying bills. Seeing that list always makes me feel a bit better on the days where I feel like a failure.
For just general mood days I find meditation really helps. Going off to a quite place on my own for even just five minutes can make a huge difference for me. It’s probably my favorite reset option.
Hi, Erin! Man, I love that idea. There are a lot of things I do that I don’t give myself credit for — and that must be true of everyone! That’s really brilliant. For a long time, I was dubious about meditation, but more and more I’m hearing how helpful it can be for people. Great advice. Thankyou!
I don’t necessarily know how to restart a bad day but if it’s really bad I do know how to give myself permission to end it early, go home, and watch Hannibal in my pajamas while eating mac and cheese and drinking wine. So soothing. The key is using this sparingly and not feeling guilty about it LOL.
If I am unable to leave work or whatever then some Boswell Sisters usually chills me out at least.
My happy place is a beach in Jupiter, Florida, where my brutheo and I often go when I visit. Thank you for this.