A while back, I wrote about focusing on our strengths instead of our weaknesses. But sometimes, it’s hard for us to even be aware of our talents and positive qualities.
A lot of people, especially creative people such as writers and artists, think that they don’t have “people skills.” They consider themselves awkward (which isn’t really a big deal, even if it feels like it) or know themselves to be introverted. You might be one of those people who thinks they know nothing about how to get people to like you… even though people like you already.
There are many different ways to connect with people. We just get hung up sometimes in comparing ourselves to one way of doing it. So today, I wanted to challenge you to think about what your social skills are. Even if you don’t consider yourself a social butterfly, you might be surprised at how many of these statements apply to you.
I’m a good listener.
I notice how other people are feeling.
I express happiness for people’s good fortune and sympathy for their troubles.
I’m open about my thoughts and feelings.
Instead of making snap judgements, I give people a chance.
I’m honest and down to earth.
I say funny things.
I appreciate other people’s sense of humor. (Note: this one might be an even better social skill than the one above!)
I’m good at conversing with people I don’t know well.
I remember people’s names.
I remember what’s going on in other people’s lives.
I let people know that I appreciate them.
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I compliment people.
I have good manners.
I can defuse an argument or conflict.
I consider other points of view besides my own.
Even when I disagree with someone, I do it respectfully.
I make good eye contact when I’m talking to people.
I’m patient when dealing with delays or complications.
I share with others — knowledge, cookies, you name it.
I help people out when they need help.
I’m able to apologize when I’m in the wrong.
Instead of always having to be the center of attention, I share the spotlight.
I collaborate well with others on projects.
I’m good at giving presentations.
I smile at people.
I encourage people.
I respect people’s personal space.
I’m great at written communication.
My body language makes me look approachable, not defensive.
I generally refrain from mean remarks and unhelpful criticism.
I talk enthusiastically about my interests and experiences. (Note: not everyone thinks of this when they’re thinking about social strengths… but people are drawn to enthusiasm!)
Now, there are a few things on this list that I’ve really struggled with in the past. And that’s okay! I can always improve, and whether I do or not, I still have a lot going for me. The same holds true for you.
Did you find your social strengths on this list? Did I forget to list some? Let me know in the comments! Thanks for reading, you likable person, and have a great week!
Great post! Makes me more confident about myself. I do let people know that I listen to and respect them, especially in a group discussion when someone is interrupted, I prompt him to speak on so that he doesn’t feel like he’s left out. (this doesn’t happen to me, though?)
Hi, Azalea. I didn’t even think about that one… noticing when someone has something to say, and making sure they get to say it. It’s too bad no one does the same for you! But I think that is a rare skill… and I bet it makes people feel a lot more appreciated. I would like to get into the habit of doing that. 🙂 Thank you so much for commenting!
You have quite a list there, Bryn! I found myself in some of the social graces on the list, but I’m afraid I need to work on most of them. One that I thought of that I don’t think was on the list was that I open doors for people. Maybe that’s just a Southern thing, though.
Hi, Janet! I feel like I need to work on most of them, myself, so we are in the same boat there… but it did make me realize I have some social skills, you know? I should have thought of opening doors for people! I don’t think I do that enough. It may be more common in the South! But that’s a good one!
Thank you. I needed to hear this. I actually found A LOT of my own strengths on this list, which is encouraging.
Hi, Rose! My apologies for the delayed response… it’s been such a crazy week… but I am SO glad this was something you needed to hear! You should know how charming you really are 🙂 Have a great weekend!
Hi I think getting past my depression to try any if these is important, my daughter struggles with getting past het shyness bad anxiety…